Tots to Teens: Managing Your Child's Online Footprint

When I was growing up, the only way to save a memory was with a digital camera, a long wait at your local photo center, and a dusty old photo album with sticky pages. However, with the invention of the smartphone, those days are long gone. A quick snap and that moment in time is saved forever, safeguarded up in the cloud.  

With the ability to take and save such amazing photos, wouldn’t we want to share them, too? The internet has increased our ability to connect in wonderful ways. We can communicate and share our lives with anyone and everyone, including family who may not live close by. 

So, what should we share, especially with our kids? What should we allow our kids to share themselves? How do we keep our kids safe online and respect their privacy? Those answers may be different for every family. Still, parents should know what the options are, how other families are navigating this process, and that it’s okay to make decisions that work best for their family.

Tough Choices

Babies and young children are probably the easiest to keep safe online simply because they have less experience with and knowledge of the world and have the least independent ability to access social media. The burden of online safekeeping is entirely on the parents, and this is where decision-making and plans for the future have to take place. 

This discussion often happens, and decisions are made long before the child is born. Social media is usually considered when deciding whether to announce the pregnancy or child's birth. 

The littlest of these 

After some careful research, I’ve taken the plunge and made the decision to give my 6-year-old son limited access to social media. I gifted him a tablet with Messenger Kids installed. We had a lengthy discussion about what the app was, how he was to use it, what was and wasn’t allowed, and that he still needed to be sitting with an adult when using the app. 

I‘ve also given him access to Hello Wonder. It’s entirely self-contained and kid-safe. No one can contact my son without me adding them to his account via their Trusted Adults feature. I felt that this was a gentle introduction to the internet. He can ask questions of the AI companion Wonder, work on his reading abilities, learn to surf the internet, and safely navigate technology. 

A friend of mine who has two children under five has decided that she is going to give her children complete autonomy over their future online presence. Until they are old enough to decide for themselves what they want to share online, no one can post pictures of her kids without her express permission, and even then, their faces need to be covered, or the photos must be from behind. She is also not posting their full names, referring to them as their first initials only. While this may not be a route many parents choose, it is one worth considering. 

Almost to the teenage years

Social media accounts came up in a recent chat with another mom friend. She has a 10-year-old daughter and is already thinking about how she plans to tackle the choice of social media. Currently, she shares photos of her daughter with close friends and family on Facebook and Instagram. As she personally knows everyone on her accounts, she feels secure in openly sharing those pictures. 

Her daughter has Messenger Kids and a Roblox account. She got Messenger Kids at age six6 during the COVID pandemic to keep in touch with her classmates, and Roblox followed soon after. My friend started with Messenger Kids because of the ability to control who the contacts are. Apps like Hello Wonder also have chat features that allow parents to control who their kids can interact with. With apps like Roblox, few safety measures are in place for kids. It’s open to everyone, unlike Hello Wonder, which is designed for parents to use with their kids. Because of the open access to Roblox, my friend had several conversations with her daughter about the app. She emphasized the dangers of chatting with strangers on Roblox and the potential harm that could come from doing so. 

They did have a scare when a stranger messaged her daughter, asking her where she lived and for other personally identifiable information. Thankfully, because of her multiple conversations with her mom, she knew better than to share that kind of information. 

They plan to wait until high school before adding additional social media apps. There is enough out there to keep her daughter busy for now. Though the mom trusts her daughter, when those apps are allowed, she plans to monitor the content and time spent semi-regularly via the tracking tools on her iPad. 

Hello Wonder has a feature called Activity Summaries that allows parents to monitor the content their children are accessing. They plan to release a similar time-monitoring feature in future updates. 

Teens and beyond

Most social media apps only require a user to be 13 to have their own account, and studies show that 75% of teenagers have at least one social media profile. Half of them report using social media daily. It should come as no surprise that parents are concerned about managing that. I asked a friend who has a 15-year-old daughter how she manages social media for her and how she came to make those decisions. 

My friend allowed her daughter to start an Instagram account since most of her friends already used social media. This was done with the understanding that the mom would have free reign to look at the social media accounts at any time. Nothing is allowed to be deleted or removed. She continues that open review process today and checks the accounts regularly. 

Eventually, her daughter was given access to Snapchat, and, as it became available, TikTok. Particularly with SnapChat, she worries that there is always the risk that someone can contact her daughter. She hopes that the safety conversations they’ve had over the years stay with her and that if anything concerning were to happen, she would report it to both the apps and her immediately. Even with older children, it’s recommended to keep location information out of posts or have private accounts for safety. Knowing the safety features on social media is critical for parents, particularly for those of older children. 

Having a solid foundation for secure social media engagement leads to safer teens. Using apps like Hello Wonder helps foster that strength and creates clear guidance on what the internet should be used for and what parental expectations are. For those kids who are beyond using Hello Wonder, open communication between parents and kids is key, and will add to that foundation. 

Safe starts and continued guidance

Kids need to be taught that the internet is forever, and what goes on there will likely remain, sometimes even after deletion. As they’re given access to these social media sites, care needs to be taken to teach them online safety, ensuring that they fully understand the consequences of their actions. 

There are plenty of reasons to be concerned about your child’s access to the internet. Of course, it’s up to you as the parent to decide what limitations you will place on your child’s friends and family. Starting with apps that are proven to be safe and kid-oriented, like Hello Wonder or Messenger Kids, is a great way to teach children about online safety and how to make decisions that may affect them for the rest of their lives. 

It's up to us as parents to begin this process, and to show our children the best way forward. Visit Hello Wonder's website to learn more and for parenting tips and tricks, or download the app and start the learning process today!